Going out for Halloween can be one of the most exciting times of the University calendar. From going to parties, to planning your perfect Halloween costume or creating your own outfit, Halloween is a time for creativity and expressing yourself, however, there’s one key thing to remember: Costumes are for fun, not for crossing lines. Regardless of what costume you are wearing, you shouldn’t feel signed up for unwanted attention or contact.
Going out for Halloween can be one of the most exciting times of the University calendar. From going to parties, to planning your perfect Halloween costume or creating your own outfit, Halloween is a time for creativity and expressing yourself, however, there’s one key thing to remember: Costumes are for fun, not for crossing lines. Regardless of what costume you are wearing, you shouldn’t feel signed up for unwanted attention or contact.
The “Costume ≠ Consent” Myth
There is a common myth that just because someone wears something that’s more revealing or shows some skin, this gives people permission to touch them or speak to them in ways that aren’t consensual. Not only is this myth incorrect, but it’s also dangerous. Someone’s clothes are never an invitation to cross boundaries and ignore consent.
Consent is a two-way street, meaning it must be given, not assumed. For instance, if you’re at a Halloween party and you’re approached by someone, they should never assume that just because you are dressed as, say, a sexy pirate, you’re okay with being touched or spoken to in a way that makes you uncomfortable and distressed. That is not how consent works, consent is all about active participation, not assuming signals based on someone’s costume – regardless of whether the costume is scary, silly or sexy.
Respect boundaries – Including your own
If someone tries to engage with you in a way, you’re uncomfortable with in any way, you have the right to say no. Regardless of what you’re wearing or whether you know the person or not, you are allowed to communicate your boundaries. And if you notice a friend in a similar kind of situation, don’t be afraid to check in with them and suggest going elsewhere or talking about it.
Likewise, if you see someone out in costume, remember to respect their personal space. If someone does not want to speak, dance or engage with you, don’t try to pressure them. Remember, you need an enthusiastic yes before touching or acting sexually with someone. Additionally, it’s important to be aware of body language. If someone backs away from you or visibly seems like they want to leave the situation, these are signs they may not be okay with your behaviour.
“But They Were Wearing a…”
Often, victims of sexual harassment or violence may feel scared to speak up if they were wearing something revealing during the incident. This can especially be exasperated by narratives that say “Well, they were dressed like (insert costume here), they must have been asking for it”. These kinds of narratives shift the blame away from the perpetrator, which is not okay.